blog, photography

Friday Funk

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I woke up in a strange mood today.

I can feel a funky mood coming over me. One of those days where I either get myself together or I bark at people all day. I hate yelling at my boys so I will make every attempt to get it together. I will spend most of my day cleaning a little, crocheting and watching movies. I may take a walk to the grocery store. My car is out of commission right now but the walk may good for me. Adding to my discontent is the fact that the first person I thought of this morning was my gold digging step-mother. When my father died she robbed my brother and I of everything. Hell, when my father was alive she robbed us of him. Thinking of her puts me in a foul mood but if the spirit is bringing her up there may be something there that I need to investigate. Ugh…

So, here is something bright and cheery to help my mood and wish you a very  happy and safe weekend!

Be brave.
Jamie Christine

 

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Out of Gems

Occasionally, I play those cheeky games on Facebook. I limit myself to one at a time because they tend to be time-consuming and you always reach a point in the game where it is nearly impossible to be successful without purchasing on all those special, sparkly gems that you need for all those extra game goodies. All those lovely unicorn trees and dancing water flower sprites inevitably end up being a requirement to complete a mission or adventure. These games are designed so that eventually you will need a sparkling pink marshmallow boat load of gems in order to be successful. In a cruel twist of fate, the world you were building suddenly comes to a screeching halt unless you dig into your wallet and surrender those debit card digits. There is always that small amount of money that you easily rationalize spending. “Pft! It is only a $1.99”, however, once you give into “it is only” then everything becomes a slippery slope and soon, you need more gems so you spend more money on precious glittery little gems to fill your cartoon kingdom with yummy flying magic dragon tarts.

Meanwhile, here in the real world, I live on a tight budget that does not allow for too many gem purchases. My household tends to allocated our money for more tangible items such as food or a place to live. I know that there our other households where twenty dollars a month isn’t a deal breaker but at my house, there are weeks where twenty dollars is the difference between eating or not. That is just my less than sparkly reality. I do, however, still enjoy playing a game every now and then.

More often than not, I have to stop playing in all those magic kingdoms because I arrive at that tipping point where I can not continue dwelling in my fantasy world without purchasing gems. I lose out on missions or special buildings due to lack of gems. The worse ones are the special missions for extra wonderful prizes in which I start the mission but find that I am unable to successfully complete it because I lack a sparkly boat load of gems. Eventually, I quit playing.

A few weeks ago I quit another one of these games. I spent weeks building a shiny, thriving city. I attempted special mission after mission, only to fail, repeatedly. My wonderful, carefully planned city became a futile exercise in wasted time. I invested hours planning, decorating, harvesting and selling all kinds of weird items only to run out of time. Every mission designed to only be successful if you purchase gems and use them to grow 300 boots on a tree in less than 24 hours. Sigh. Discouraged, I quit showing up every day.

A week after I abandoned my city. I was grocery shopping when it occurred to me that all these failed missions are ireily similar to how I feel some times. I feel like, years ago, I started out to build a life. I had huge sparkly, magical dreams. In hindsight, all those unicorn, marshmallow, glitter filled, sugar plum visions were fruitless missions that I was unable to complete due to lack of gems. All those elusive gems necessary to a construct a successful life, whatever they were, I was missing them.

Instead, I attempted to succeed despite where you are or what you have. I am not sure that has gone well. My kingdom looks more like a nuclear bomb went off rather than a joyful world of success. The moving to Prescott endeavor is a perfect example. I’ve wanted to move to Prescott for close to a decade, no lie. Finally decide to go for it only to discover that affordable housing for a family with pets is near impossible to find, let alone secure. I need a gem to finish this quest. I have no money to click and make one appear.

I am at the point where I have to ask, do I abandon this effort or do we pursue further?
Where are all the gems?

Be Brave.
Jamie Christine

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Friday Photographs

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The blog is beginning to take on a little more shape than last week. I am starting to get a schedule of what I will write about on each day. Hopefully, things will begin to take on a little more structure, at least for me. You never know the challenges of creating daily blog post till you write a blog.

I suppose, it really is about finding all the different parts of your voice and creating harmony on paper. It is about establishing a place where everything you wish to convey to the world works together like shards of colored glass in a kaleidoscope. Each new day turns into a dazzling display of something new to behold, yet, it is composed of the exact number of multi-colored flecks as the day prior. All these little voices spinning round and round until they land in a manner which is beautiful.

My task at hand is make all the little pieces to co-operate long enough actually say something worth while. Finding your singular voice while acknowledging all the fracture pieces and spinning trapped in a tube is a daunting task. Most days, I am just happy to get an entry composed before 6 a.m.

Voices can be like roses. No one can unfold a rose forcing it open to see its beauty. It must open on its own time and in it’s own way. Otherwise, it just won’t be a rose.

Be brave.
Jamie Christine

blog, photography

Special Saturday Entry

Hello,
I know that Saturday is not my regular day to post but I was off this week and didn’t get my regular entries completed. #BadBlogger.

I am dropping by real quick to say “Hi” and let you know I am still here. Still unemployed. Still using my air conditioner in October. Not happy about this fact.

As for my interview. I share the details next week but I made it through first rounds. I have been invited to have a second interview next week so here’s hoping for wonderful news.

Preparing to move. I’ve packed one box of dishes. I do not know when or where I am moving. I just know that I am moving.

Here is a photo that I love. Which reminds me that I may be entering a photo contest this month at National Geographic. Wouldn’t that be stellar!
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Gentle reminder. All photos are copyrighted by me and bentblossom.com. 🙂 Thank you!

Take Care.
Be Brave.
Jamie Christine

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What is Bent Blossom?

October 2, 2017
Two days in a row.

For today’s post, I would like to explain how Bent Blossom came to be and what you can expect to see as things unfold. IF things go as planned. If life has anything to do with it, things will almost never go completely as planned. Which sometimes that is good. Sometimes it is not so good.

Okay, I do not entirely know what I am doing. Surprise!

As mentioned yesterday, I have been starting blogs for an extremely long time. I would start them, get everything set up, write a few entries and then loose my motivation. Eventually, I simply went back and deleted them. I can honestly say that most of the time I quit blogging because the blogs, well, if they didn’t make money, they fell to wayside in my busy life. All of my blogs, with one exception.

Around 2013, I started a photography blog. I kept up with for months because photography is one of my greatest passions in life. I wasn’t make money but that did not matter. I was taking photos, connecting with other photographers and sharing my work. I loved it. Then, in May 2014, my oldest son died. Everything stopped. I have yet to find the motivation to return to that particular blog. I’ve wiped all the entries. The next few  years, I refused to write anything at all.

April 2016, the blogging bug comes back to me. I argue with myself for weeks. I was absolutely determined not to write another word as long as I lived. After my son’s passing, it was close to a year before I picked up a camera. Writing, as far as I was concerned, was off the table for ever.

You know what they say, never say never. Slowly but surely picking up the blogging again crept back into the forefront of my mind. I tried returning to my previous photography blog but it never manifested. Every time I went there, I was overwhelmed with my son’s passing and eventually just stopped going to that blog.

Anyway, back to April 2016. I felt the blog itch starting so, I came up with a name. Bent Blossom. The name came from two things. Years ago, I had a blog titled, Happy Little Wallflower. I loved the name. I considered resurrecting that name but happy was not quite how I felt after my son’s death. Then I heard, Pink sing, “Just a second we’re not broken just bent, and we can learn to love again.” from her song, Just Give Me a Reason.

Bent. Yep. Life has surely bent me, in a million different ways but I am not broken. God only knows if we ever learn to love again.

Blossom. Well, I just love flowers. It also tied into the Little Wallflower.

Bent Blossom. There you have it. That’s how it started. Where is it going to go from here?

Well, here’s what  you can expect. I will show up. I will share. I will be honest. We’ll just go from there.

Be Brave.
Jamie Christine